Be educated and educated person. What does it mean to be raised? Table behavior

This is the one who has mastered it perfectly. Thanks to good manners, it is possible to establish favorable relations with society, which significantly increases the comfort of life for each person.

Distinctive features

This is a person who uses expressions, intonation and tone in a conversation that are conducive to benevolent communication. Also, gestures, gait, facial expressions play an important role. You should be moderately modest, but not squeezed and secretive. When you give your word, you need to be responsible for it, keep your promises, because you need not only to make a good impression, but also to consolidate it, to maintain it for a long time.

The qualities of a well-mannered person help him to communicate tactfully with others. There are specific instructions and tips, thanks to which you can get a fairly clear idea of ​​the framework of etiquette, being in which you will be known as a pleasant interlocutor and a welcome guest in any company.

Correct communication

For starters, do not speak too loudly and use harsh language, because your goal is not to outshout your opponent. If you have a dispute with someone, you should completely rely on the consistency and argumentation of your own position. A well-mannered person is a person who can assert himself through calm confidence in his own arguments, and not emotional pressure on a competitor. Gestures should be calm and smooth, do not make excessively sharp movements, they usually leave a not very pleasant impression.

In fact, the people around them want to tune in to a wave of peace and harmony, deep down they will not forgive you if you want to disturb this state. In addition to the fact that you should not interfere with the life of the rest, it is worth thinking about yourself. Keep track of your wardrobe. It is not necessary to dress in the latest fashion in the latest from the most expensive brands, but well-mannered person must at least monitor the cleanliness and tidiness of his own clothes. There is nothing difficult in putting on only clean things, ironing them before putting them on, cleaning shoes.

The importance of self-control

Life does not always follow the scenario that we draw in our imaginations. Sometimes it drives us into a dead end, causes stress, makes us leave our comfort zone, but even then you should not lose your composure, blaming everything on circumstances.

What kind of person is called educated? Perhaps the one who, stepping on a cat in a dark corridor, calls it a cat. That is, good manners should not be a mask for you, with the help of which you try to get into the trust of others. They should become a norm, a habit, the only acceptable way of communication.

Even if you did not share something with someone, your opinions disagreed with someone else's in the dialogue, you are faced with a complete reluctance to take your arguments into account, you should not lose control. In such situations, the best advisor is the voice of reason, as well as those learned earlier, which will help not to lead the situation into an even greater impasse.

The rules of a well-mannered person exclude the manifestation of ill will towards other people. We can say that you have a different point of view, but in no case get personal. It is enough to conclude that you are not on the way, and disperse without going into further details.

Show respect and courtesy

Respect in society must be earned and, most importantly, not lost in the future. What kind of person is called educated? Someone who is always ready to listen carefully to anyone who turns to him for advice, or in any case not to show obvious disdain. It can be difficult at times.

Everyone has situations when there is neither time nor desire to communicate with any particular person. At such moments, it is very important to deviate from the conversation tactfully so that the interlocutor does not have an unpleasant aftertaste on his soul.

To be able to follow your interests, while not offending others, is a great art, worthy, in order to understand and master it, because it greatly simplifies life and opens up many possibilities.

Do not humiliate yourself and do not impose

You can also consider the opposite situation, when you need something, but they do not want to communicate with you, for lack of all the same free time or a banal craving for this. A well-mannered person is one who will not impose and put his own interests at the forefront. You can only offer your own society.

There is nothing shameful in asking others for a favor, but true tactlessness will extort it, reproach for indifference, and so on. In essence, blaming other people is tactlessness. In fact, such people blame others for what they themselves sin a lot.

If you try to achieve what you want by such methods, you can fall very low in the eyes of others, and then it will be very difficult to return a positive impression about yourself.

Improving the social life of the individual

Thanks to the rules of etiquette, you can get an idea of ​​how to behave so that there are no awkward situations and conflicts with other individuals. V general outline they imply respect and benevolence when communicating. In this case, the social position or the position of the interlocutor should not play a significant role. Everyone is equally worthy to be treated properly.

Within the framework of humanism, it is believed that every human creation is inherently pure. Etiquette helps you not to lose this inner light, maintain it in yourself and take care of the well-being of others.

Man is a creature for whom life is considered optimal in a society of his own kind. We are all closely related. By insulting someone, you are defaming yourself. This will never be done by a person whose upbringing and manners will not allow such a fall.

By maintaining friendly relations with other people, the person provides his own peace. By respecting others, you also put yourself high. Those who assert themselves through rudeness and humiliation tend to have low self-esteem and do not consider themselves important.

Conversely, individuals who show respect for those who are around feel quite confident and comfortable in society. The choice is yours.

An essay on the theme "what it means to be educated" 5.00 /5 (100.00%) 1 vote

What does it mean to be raised? As children, we are constantly taught to be polite. It is understandable: coming into this world, little man has neither knowledge of its laws, nor the skills of living in society. Therefore, both at home and at school, we constantly hear both soft wishes and hard rules that need to be learned and mastered in order to be known as a well-mannered person: do not use obscene words, do not litter on the street, do not talk while eating, respect elders, and always say "Thank you" and "Please."


As we mature, we understand that everything is much more complicated. Modern world dictates that lifestyle, which sometimes cannot be kept up. But we will try to do this by talking here about what does it mean now: to be educated? Signs of a well-mannered person Politeness. It is she who does not allow us to quarrel on every occasion, anger and irritation makes us keep in ourselves, contributes to the emergence of respect. Politeness can be both innate (from the soul) and acquired (from upbringing). Tact. He tells us the line of behavior towards the people around us, and a particularly delicate approach to each person. Tactfulness is always a border, crossing which, you can greatly offend a person. Therefore, this border must always be felt and observed. It is this sense of tact that allows us to understand that the person's reaction to our actions is not quite what we expected, and it is time to apologize. Good manners.
Jonathan Swift wrote: "The one who embarrasses the least number of people has good manners." There are many little things you can do alone at home, but not in front of other people. For example, singing loudly, brushing your nails, or blowing your nose. Modesty. Not to be confused with shyness or timidity! A modest person never emphasizes his superiority, does not seek to appear better or smarter than others. He does not demand any privileges or services for himself, but he always remains firm in his principles. Punctuality. This is one aspect of good manners and politeness. Being late is permissible only for a very good reason, all other excuses for a bad habit of being late are just a sign of bad form. A well-bred person is a mature person who respects the interests of other people and the norms of behavior in society. To be educated, you need to have the desire to grow and improve every day. Are you a well-mannered person?

A well-bred person has sufficient tact, he knows how to behave in society, has good manners. A well-mannered person is not difficult to recognize at first glance. His appearance speaks for itself: he does not get lost in an unfamiliar society, he knows how to sit at the table, eat beautifully and neatly. But good manners are not only about good manners. This is something deep and essential in a person. This “something” is an internal culture and intelligence, the basis of which is cordiality and respect for another person.

The phrases became completely natural for us: “He is a well-bred person”, “She is just a boor”, etc. But often we ourselves find it difficult to define what we mean by the concept of “educated person”. And, by the way, it would be nice to know what exactly the upbringing is made of, if only in order to be exactly what those around us want to see us.

The qualities that a well-mannered person possesses

Politeness. The ancient Greeks argued that one had to be a very outstanding person in order to allow oneself to be impolite. It is politeness that softens morals, prevents quarrels, pacifies irritation and hatred, forces one to restrain, contributes to the emergence of love and respect. Politeness can be learned, but there is also an innate politeness that comes from the soul, not from upbringing.

The courtesy rules prohibit:

- enter an official institution wearing a hat (for men) and speak loudly (for both sexes);

- make noise, disturb and annoy others;

- criticize someone's religious beliefs;

- humiliate someone's nationality;

- laugh at the mistakes and mistakes of other people;

- endow the interlocutor aloud with offensive epithets;

- send a letter or a gift to the return address;

- in a disrespectful tone speak about the loved ones of the interlocutor;

- to distort names and surnames;

- open someone else's bag, look into it if it is open, examine the contents of someone else's pockets;

- to unauthorizedly pull out the drawers of someone else's table and shift their contents both at work and at home, as well as open someone else's closet, buffet, pantry.

Tact. Tact is the moral intuition of an educated person, as if prompting him the most correct approach, the most subtle, delicate, careful line of behavior towards others.

Tact presupposes in us tolerance, generosity, attention and deep respect for the inner world of other people, a sincere desire and ability to understand them, to feel what can bring them joy and what can upset them. Tactfulness is a sense of proportion that should be observed in a conversation, in any relationship with people, the ability not to cross the border, beyond which there is always an insult to the interlocutor. Tactfulness also implies the ability to timely determine the interlocutor's reaction to our words or actions and, if necessary, self-criticism and the ability to apologize in time for a mistake.

Tact does not negate adherence to principles, frankness, honesty, and the rules of tactful behavior are far from the first in the moral code. But very often it is the lack of tact that hurts people close to us.

Punctuality. It is she who testifies to good manners. Only a good reason can excuse being late. Deliberately keeping oneself waiting (even for young ladies invited on a first date) is impolite.

Modesty. A modest person never seeks to show himself better, more capable, smarter than others, does not emphasize his superiority over them, does not talk about his qualities, does not require any privileges, special services, or amenities.

At the same time, modesty is not shyness or shyness. Usually truly humble people in critical situations turn out to be much more firm than others in upholding their principles.

Helpfulness. It is a virtue until it becomes an obsession. It is best to make it a rule to provide services only when asked to do so. If they turn to you with a request that you are not able to fulfill, it is better to refuse right away than to give your word and not keep it.

Good manners. “The one who embarrasses the least number of people has good manners,” argued Jonathan Swift.

Not accepted in society:

- put yourself and your clothes in order, straighten your tie, hair, clean your nails;

- comb your hair and generally touch your hair;

- use your little finger nail as a toothpick;

- snapping the knuckles;

- rub your hands;

- pulling on clothes;

- constantly "purr" something under your breath;

- with violent manifestations, offensive, rude words to reveal their anger and indignation.

Now look at your behavior and think how polite you are.

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Conversation

"What does a well-mannered person mean."

Target: to form a sense of duty, responsibility to others.

Tasks: to acquaint pupils with a brief set of rules for human behavior; to educate the pupils of the class with universal human norms of morality (kindness, mutual understanding, tolerance towards people)

Conversation progress:

    Organization of the start of the conversation.

    Main part.

We live among people, communicate every day, worry, worry, but are our actions always moral, pure, open? Are they always approved by others? Do they always bring good to people?

There are thousands of situations in life that cannot be foreseen by any - even the most complete - set of rules of behavior. And then the only correct decision will be prompted by good breeding. What kind of person can be called educated?

He will not allow impudence, rudeness.

He will affirm positive qualities in a person - tolerance, unobtrusiveness, simplicity, delicacy, understanding. Etc.

Where do these qualities come from?

Education from childhood.

With the help of adults.

Observe people whose behavior you like. Etc.

But if we distinguish educated people, is it not possible to learn something from them? What is needed for this, let's think together:

1) you need to know how you would like to be,

2) you need to know what we are.

3) how to bridge the gap between the second and the first.

"Know thyself" - said the ancient Greeks and believed that this was the most difficult thing in the world.

To achieve this, there are several tricks that the guys will tell us about.

Moral- this is respect for the rights, freedoms, dignity of the individual. Morality is inconceivable without the correspondence of word and deed; it grows on the basis of concrete life activity - labor, communication, customs and traditions of a particular community. And speaking about the lack of morality in our

harsh time, we complain about the lack of kindness, attention, tact, mercy, decency. In addition, we are often victims of

irresponsibility, we are outraged, we are indignant, but how often are we ourselves a role model? Are we ourselves obligated?

· Do you consider yourself a responsible person?

· What does it mean to be a responsible person?

Pupils are invited to listen to the short story-sketch "Obligation"

from the book by Lyudmila Alyoshina "On politeness, tact, on delicacy ..."

"Obligation".

Finally the Ermolovs got an apartment! Joyfully and energetically Zina

rushed to the shops, bought new curtains, kitchen utensils,

lamps, playpen for babies, shelves and hooks for the bathroom ...

The move was scheduled for Sunday. On this day, as you know, the nursery is not

work, and they have two: one year, the second two. What to do? Himself not

deal with the move. Pavel addressed the team members:

Who will help?

Many also moved. And Rebrov, the guy is single, promised.

Thank you, - Ermolov was delighted. - We have two kids, you know.

What are you talking about! What time is it?

Come up to ten.

Clear!

Won't you let me down?

Failing is not good, ”Rebrov said solidly.

They shook hands and parted.

Arriving home, Pavel told Zina:

Seryoga Rebrov will come and help. You will study the children.

On Sunday the weather was gloomy and windy. A light rain was falling. By

TV - hockey. Rebrov did not want to leave the house. And he stayed in a warm room, in an easy chair, in front of a color TV.

How the Ermolovs managed, we will not guess. Moved. Nervous, worried. They did not believe that Rebrov simply did not give a damn about them.

We were worried if something had happened to him on the way. First joy

stay in the new apartment was overshadowed ...

· Are you familiar with this situation?

· How would you react to the act of Rebrov?

· Obligation - is it important in our life?

Continued reading of the sketch.

On Monday, meeting Zina Ermolova in the field trip, Rebrov, as if nothing had happened, cheerfully said:

Zina threw a stern look at him, walked past.

Rebrov threw after her:

Need to say hello! So impolite!

Zina did not look back, quickly went into the locker room.

At lunchtime, seeing Pavel, Rebrov complained:

Your half is painfully evil!

Pavel grunted:

But you are kind!

Rebrov shouted after him:

Would take an interest! Maybe I was sick!

For hockey! - Pavel responded.

After work, leaving the shop, Rebrov was indignant:

Offended! I owe them something!

Promised? - asked his fellow in the brigade.

Well, I promised.

It is necessary to keep the word!

You would have held! - Rebrov snapped.

Firstly, I did not give a word, and secondly, I moved myself.

That they have no relatives? - Rebrov shouted into the void. Around

There was no one.

Nobody condemned Rebrov, nobody reprimanded him. None of the old masters scolded. But condemnation of his deed hung in the air. He felt it. It was uncomfortable.

As time went. The atmosphere in the brigade did not change. Around Rebrov

A kind of vacuum has formed. Once he asked Vasya Kopylov:

What's happening?!

Vasya shrugged his shoulders:

- "The weather is normal on the island." Do you remember this song?

I'm not talking about the song! - Rebrov snapped.

And what about? - Vasya looked into Rebrov's eyes, as if he did not understand what

Everyone understood that it was difficult for Rebrov to exist in alienation. But

the alienation of the comrades was stable.

Somehow Rebrov caught up with the foreman, went with him on the bus, even though he was not on the way. Pressed by the passengers close to the foreman, he asked:

What's happening?!

We work, we struggle with difficulties, - I heard a calm answer.

What, don't you see anything ?! - exploded Rebrov.

I see you are suffering. So you have a conscience. I'm glad about that.

I’m tired of myself lately, ”Rebrov admitted.

You would not toil in vain, but help people. Turned to you - it means that there was a need for you. What are you waiting for? That Ermolov would come up and say, “Thank you for letting you down”?

Why thank you? They immersed me in a zone of silence, do you think it's easy for me?

You are not about yourself - think about people. Do at least a little good, you will feel happy

Maybe go to the Yermolovs, help nail, screw something ... In new apartments, work to hell ...

This is a thought. Well, I have to go out, be healthy. - The foreman left

bus. And Rebrov went to the Ermolovs.

    Give examples from your life when I let you down

optionality of other people. Who would you not go on scouting with?

· Are adults often irresponsible?

· Is it possible to develop in oneself this quality - responsibility?

    Find synonyms for "responsibility".

(Obligation, sense of duty, punctuality ...)

"What should be a well-mannered person?"

Now that we've exchanged views, let's summarize: What basic rules should a well-bred person follow?

    Be precise and accurate;

    Do not rip off evil on others;

    Do not interrupt the interlocutor;

    Behave yourself at a party;

    Remember to thank.

What is the name of the person who follows these rules? (Well-mannered, cultured).

What character traits show a person's upbringing?

4... The game "We take - we do not take"

Guys, I will give you a list where the main character traits of a person are written, and you will note who chooses which character traits for themselves.

. Accuracy;

    Indifference, gratitude;

    Good manners, politeness, grumpiness;

    Coarseness;

    Greed;

  • Impudence;

    Modesty, empathy;

    Tact;

    Generosity;

    Poisonousness.

Now tell me who chose what and from your words we will compose a flower, the petals of which are the best character traits that a well-bred person possesses.

“Education cannot be hammered into, hammered into a person, it cannot be grafted, pinned on, it cannot be forced on a person.

This is such a quality that grows from the inside as a result of a person's own work on himself.».

The results of the lesson are summed up by the students, pronouncing the main thoughts that were voiced in the lesson: (slide 8)

well-mannered to be good:

it is necessary to strive for this;

we need to work on it,

you need to do self-improvement.

Each of your actions reflects on other people, do not forget that there is a person next to you.

As a keepsake, I present the rules that we discussed today. Don't forget to do them!

Don't forget to thank each other!

Therefore, I also thank you for your active work, be educated, kind, smart!

III. The result of the conversation. Reflection.

So we live among people, in society. Communication with people

also implies certain obligations, which we remember

should, so that they can say about us: "You can rely on him, he does not

MATERIAL

to extracurricular work

"What does it mean to be a raised person"

Teacher:

Vdovichenko N.N.


What does "educated person" mean?

Good breeding is the assimilation of good habits.

Plato

- How do you answer this question?

V explanatory dictionary it is said that "educated is one who knows how to behave well."

- Whom do we consider educated? Maybe someone who has graduated?

Life shows that every educated person cannot be considered educated. Education in itself does not predetermine good breeding, although it creates favorable conditions for this.

A well-bred person has sufficient tact, he knows how to behave in society, has good manners. A well-mannered person is not difficult to recognize at first glance. His appearance speaks for itself: he does not get lost in an unfamiliar society, he knows how to sit at the table, eat beautifully and neatly. But good manners are not only about good manners. This is something deep and essential in a person. This “something” is an internal culture and intelligence, the basis of which is cordiality and respect for another person.

Example (memoirs of the People's Artist of the USSR):

“It seems to me that the actor of the Art Theater Vasily Ivanovich Kachalov is the standard of such qualities. He walked along the street - and then you will admire. Both modestly and festively ... He certainly remembered all the names and patronymics of the people with whom he met. He organically respected people and was always interested in them. With him, every woman felt attractive, a gentle creature, worthy of care. The man felt smart and really needed him (Katchalov) at the moment. Vasily Ivanovich, as it were, "absorbed" other people's lives, faces, characters, and he was among people as a holiday, as human beauty and nobility. "

In this regard, I would like to recall such a quality of personality as charm. A charming person has an attractive power, he is always friendly, prudent, his smile is light and natural, meeting and talking with him is a pleasure. And to be educated means to be attentive to another, delicate, tactful, not petty.

Example. In a letter to his brother Nikolai, Anton Pavlovich Chekhov writes what conditions, in his opinion, educated people should satisfy. I think it is useful for us to listen to his words: “They respect the human person, and therefore are always condescending, gentle, polite, compliant ... They do not rebel over a hammer or a missing rubber band; living with someone, they don’t do it as a favor, and when they leave, they don’t say: “You cannot live with you!” They forgive noise, cold, and overcooked meat, and pungency, and the presence of strangers in their homes ...

They are sincere and afraid of lies like fire. They do not lie even in trifles. Lying is offensive to the listener and vulgar in his eyes on the speaker. They do not show themselves, behave in the street just like at home, do not let dust in the eyes of the younger brothers. They are not chatty and do not go out with frankness when they are not asked ...

They do not demean themselves in order to arouse sympathy in another. They do not play on the strings of someone else's soul, so that in response they sigh and nurse them. They do not say: “They don’t understand me!” - because all this has a cheap effect, vulgar, old, false ...

They are not vain. They are not interested in such fake diamonds as meeting celebrities ... Doing business for a penny, they do not rush with their stick for a hundred rubles and do not boast that they were allowed to go where others were not allowed ... "

Conclusion: genuine good manners and culture cannot be combined with arrogance of the aristocracy.

Completely incompatible with the concept of a well-bred person is cynicism - arrogant, shameless behavior, imbued with contempt for people. Cynicism is a deep manifestation of bad manners, lack of genuine inner culture, disrespect for people and society.

"Cynicism is dangerous, first of all, because it raises malice into virtue" (André Maurois, French writer).

People with cynical behavior are able not to create, but to destroy, not to respect, but to humiliate the people around them; and most importantly, they do not feel their own responsibility for anything.

- What is the main quality that distinguishes an educated person from an ill-mannered person?

Attitude towards people, attention to them, respect for their individuality.

Each person feels and perceives in his own way the world, he has his own peculiarities of memory, thinking, attention, he has a kind of imagination, his own interests, needs, sympathy, affection, mood features, greater or lesser strength of emotional experiences, strong or weak will, "easy" or "difficult" character, him his life experience, his observations, his disappointments, sorrows and joys, habits, finally, his own destiny. What is this wealth - inner world man!

There are no uninteresting people in the world.

Their fates are like the stories of the planets:

Each has everything special, its own,

And there are no planets like her.

E . Evtushenko

How important it is to understand and constantly remember that not only I have such a complex inner world, but also each of the people around me. And if the person who is next to me is different from me, this does not mean that he is worse than me. He's just different, and you need to respect this other person with his individual characteristics, with his strengths and weaknesses. It is necessary to proceed from the fact that the other person is an independent person who determines his own behavior. Therefore, prodding, rudeness, yanking, commanding tone, etc., are incompatible with the concept of "educated person."

An educated person not only knows how to understand himself, his desires, opportunities, actions, but also knows how to understand the people around him, take into account and respect their interests, desires, tastes, habits, moods, and sincerely respond to their feelings and experiences.

Example. “It also happens so, - writes the writer S. Shurtakov, - whether on the road, in a distant village, you will meet a new person, a stranger; you will look at a person: he looks handsome, and it is interesting to talk to him, and is smart, and in general, as they used to say in the old days, all the lands are in him. However, you talked to your new acquaintance, got to know him better, shook his hand goodbye and said goodbye, but you just feel, you understand: if there is no such date, you will not be very upset, you will not be sad. In your eyes the person has remained, but in your heart - no, nothing touched him, nothing of all the interesting conversations in him responded. "

Indeed, how each of us wants to meet in the interlocutor the consonance of thoughts, feelings, moods. We are grateful to those people who listen to us sympathetically, try to understand what interests us and worries. We often do not need specific advice, but we need to "speak out" in the presence of a person whose benevolence we feel in ourselves. What about feedback?

But others expect the same from us! They hope for understanding and interest in them from our side. And it is not so easy to understand the characteristics of a person. We often explain the actions, moods and attitudes of others based on our own ideas about their causes. I must say that good man usually sees good motives in the actions and relationships of people. And bad - bad.

A good person is usually gullible. In his relationships with people, he proceeds from the idea that everyone is kind, honest, decent, and he is very surprised and upset when he does not find these qualities in someone. A bad person is suspicious, he sees in everyone a swindler, a careerist, he explains any success of another person by the cunning of that person, flattery, deceit; and it is very difficult to convince him of the decency of this person.

In general, the ability to understand the most essential features of another person, to determine the true meaning of his actions, moods, differences in assessments and ideas that arise in people, testifies to a sufficiently high cultural development of a person.

A cultured, well-mannered person, first of all, takes care not to humiliate the dignity of another person.

I would like to draw your attention to one more quality that we are embarrassed to talk about out loud, which many, unfortunately, consider old-fashioned. This is nobility.

True nobility is to come to the aid of a person, no matter what unfavorable circumstances and consequences accompany this. Associated with this quality is the ability of a person to compassion, empathize, sympathize, contribute - a sign of the spiritual maturity of a person.

Nobility - high morality of a person, combined with selflessness and honesty.

We sometimes have happy moments of meeting a noble person, but these moments are very rare. Why? Probably because there are really very few noble and truly cultured people in life.

Well, and what about ourselves? For some reason, we dare to demand nobility and generosity, sympathy and understanding, forgiveness and help from other people in relation to us. And yourself? Let's ask ourselves a few questions and try to answer them.

What is the main thing for us - "to be" or "to seem"? Are we interested in people by themselves, outside of their position, place of work and material opportunities? Do we respect others or are we just pretending? Do we love anyone other than ourselves? In other words, what are our innermost, innermost needs, desires and values?

However we answer these questions, our words, actions, deeds and attitudes betray us.

The great I. Goethe wrote that "behavior is a mirror in which everyone shows their true appearance."

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE TRAINED?

The phrases became completely natural for us: “He is a well-bred person”, “She is just a boor”, etc. But often we ourselves find it difficult to define what we mean by the concept of “educated person”. And, by the way, it would be nice to know what exactly the upbringing is made of, if only in order to be exactly what those around us want to see us.